Screwed?!?!

Today I went for my two week post surgery check up with DR. M (I am really only 1.5 weeks post surgery, but lets not split hairs about it ;) )
To the left is the beautifully drawn masterpiece of my hip by Dr. M. The scrambled mess on the drawing is the artistic version of all my cartilage that is bad/gone/ and or destroyed. I also have no labrum left either (so glad the first two surgeries to repair my labrum worked!...and yes that was me being totally sarcastic)
So The Brief Version:
* Removed Bandages...incision looks ..um lets say..gross..yup that's a good adjective!  It will get better w/ time...he cut into a good 4 to 5 inches of my SDD incision. Good News no infections and it is healing well!
*Stopped Pain Meds (DR M was actually shocked...he said "good job, because I know you must be in pain") Pain meds are like poison to my body..they make me so sick, but on the same note they are a little piece of heaven when you are in severe pain....it is my body's catch-22! Ice, ibuprofen, and rest can take care of me  now.
**Now that the screws are out we will be doing a double MRI of both my left and right hip..yes my left hip also has FAI and is hurting currently..but we are so not going there at the moment. It is a 2 hour MRI..I am actually freaked out by this more than surgery #4 (OK maybe I won't go that far nonetheless not happy about it)...I really don't know how I can stay still in a MRI machine for 2 hours!

So I now have two appointments set up with two different hip surgeons in two different hospitals who do hip replacements..I am not going to rush into this..I want to make sure this is the only way to go..and one opinion at this point won't cut it for me!

Good news I can start to go back to PT next week..just no aqua therapy for a month (boo!), because of the incision.

I guess the best news from all of this is that that screw removal really seemed to have help the sharp pain I was getting in my side..so YAY..a surgery worked..but I couldn't help feeling a little "screwed" leaving my appointment with Dr. M. 


(Picture to the right...2 weeks post op...I put on some make-up and made myself feel more human than patient..it actually picked up my mood ..which is nice after a looooooong 2 weeks ;)

Later Hipsters! xo

Screw It!

4th Hip Surgery: Had to even change my intro to my blog.

So on Jan 12th 2011 I had my three screws that were in my hip taken out. Also I had my IT band lengthened and leftover stiches from surgery #3 removed. As well as a cortisone injection into my hip joint for pain relief and diagnostic means (to check-in on my arthritis situation in my hip). Dr. M felt that the surgery was a success..to define sucess with this surgery:

1. Screws did not break during removal

and I survived..;)

A little pre surgery drama set the tone for the next 3 days:

1. Massive Snowstorm was heading to Boston for the morning of my surgery

2.A relative of Dr. M died the day before and he had to leave right after surgery during the storm to a funeral in NJ (Dr. M called me the night before surgery to tell me this and to go over all the possible outcomes "bad things that could happen" during surgery)

3.I was told by Dr. M that I would have a covering surgeon follow me post operative (lets just put it this way..I wasn't a big fan of the "covering Dr"...enough said)

So a Action Plan was put into effect: Plan is as followed:

 A. D and I packed our bags and headed out the night before surgery to stay with my Dad and my Stepmother who live close by to the hospital

B. We parked my car in the Beth Israel Hospital parking lot to avoid parking issue in Boston..and shoveling!

C. Slept

D. My Dad and D got up at 6:30am and shoveled out my Dad's car (HUGE SNOWSTORM..predictions were correct) while I showered w/ this cleansing shower treatment the hospital wanted me to use (that was the first time I had to do that..maybe because I was at an adult hospital this time around ;) )

E. Made it to the hospital because of my dad's superior driving skills and was the FIRST patient to arrive at the OR for my 8am Check-in (no stickers for being on time..awww i missed the good ole days at Children's Hospital ;) )

F. Dr M arrived at 9am (surgery on)

New Hospital but same old routine..... put on a hospital johnny that was way to big and did not cover my backside....had IV put in...went over my thousand allergies and had and in depth talk with the anesthesiologist (the please don't let me die speech I usually give them ..just to keep them on their toes)... then Dr M and his gang come by and do the greet and meet....then I get the speech about all the what if's.....I then sign my life away on the dotted line....Dr M then autograph's my right hip...Mr. anesthesiologist comes back and gives me the "relaxing med" through my IV (and trust me those meds relax the heck out of you to the point you are almost laughing going into surgery..I think I actually started making jokes, and I was scared out of my wits only a few moments prior)...and then they wheeled me into the OR..Lights Out!

When I awoke..Ok I don't remember much at that point..I do remember that they gave me a container with my screws (a request I made before surgery..and as my friend pointed out why not I paid for them)...I remember having the chills really bad...and I remember I wasn't allowed any visitors..(that kind of sucked.) I think a few hours went by and then I got wheeled to my hospital room. D was there when I got there (at least that is what he told me) in all seriousness I actually don't remember a lot of the first day and night, but D was by my side the whole time so he filled me in. It took me 24 hours before I actually got some sleep..well besides when they knocked me out for surgery...does that count as sleep?? I spent a total of 3 days in the hospital. I felt pretty lousy the whole time I am not going to sugarcoat it for you..there was a lot of pain and the medication made me very sick. I got up on my crutches and walked the hall a little by day 3 and that felt really weird. I only can described it like this: It felt like they sewed a lead weight into my hip. It was heavy, tight, and painful to move, but I did walk and that is what you have to do to move on!

Dr M had to re-open 4 inches of my 12 inch scar from my last hip surgery (it is still covered up with bandages, so I have no idea what it looks like..all I can tell you is that it's real itchy..ugh). I see Dr M in a week for my follow up and I think bandage removal. I am now officially one week post surgery and I am definitely doing better than I was a week ago. My pre- surgery pain has subsided (yay), but I have surgical pain in it's place..it will be interesting to see how my hip will be feeling once it has healed...fingers and toes crossed that it will feel much better. It is truly a pain to be in pain..and that my friends is quite the understatement ;).

Dr M says the first two weeks are the worst....so I will get back to you in a week and let you know how things are..until then I am going to keep on resting and healing!

**Thank You D for staying with me morning, noon, and night for the 3 days in the hospital..I can't thank you enough for being my prince charming!

**Thank you to my family and friends for all your encouragement, love and support!

I Always Think People Are Joking When They Tell Me I Have A Screw Loose ;)

Well actually I have 3 screws that need to be removed!
So to backtrack a moment:
On Christmas Eve I felt a sharp shooting pain in my hip that literally made me scream out loud (I actually think I scared D and his brother). After resting for 10 minutes or so the pain subsided. 48 hours later it happened again..twice! To describe the pain that I felt I believe is virtually impossible...but the only thing I can say it didn't last long, but the sharpness of it took my breath away ...OUCH!
I then developed swelling next to my incision going towards the back of my leg..kind of like a tennis ball under my skin. After a few calls back and forth with Childrens Hospital's on call staff (who are great by the way) I decided to pay them a visit. They waived the "I am to old for Children's Hospital rule" for me that night. So back at CH one more time. They got me into a room in the ER immediately after walking in the door (impressive) ! I had some X-rays done on my hip , was administered pain medication (which did help), and some Zofran for nausea (upset belly due to pain) . After seeing two surgeons and the ER Dr. their  conclusion was that I had no infection, but an abnormality on my X-ray, swelling in my hip (duh), and a very tight IT band and Psoas tendon, as well as tendinitus in a new set of muscles/ tendons?? in the back of my leg. They felt that my "hardware" should be removed/ my body was rejecting the screws and causing some havoc in my hip. On Monday when Dr. M was back at work he looked over my reports and X-rays and felt they were right and has now booked me for surgery.... NEXT WEEK!! I guess this time there really is no waiting game. So 2011 and one more hip surgery........4th time is the charm ????!!!!
 Dr. M is also going to be doing a cortisone injection as well that day into my hip joint for a diagnostic tool and  for possible pain relief as well (there was talk last month at our visit of possibly needing to replace my hip..this is one tool he will be using to see how my hip is doing).
Hopefully the removal of the screws will bring me the pain relief I so desperately need. This hip is really making a mess of things for me and I need it to behave...like NOW!
So at this point I am back on crutches to reduce swelling, and waiting patiently (kind of) for next week to come and get this hopefully LAST surgery over and done with.

I really hope this works...I am done with pain, surgeries, and my hip in general! I will let you know how it goes..until then please keep your fingers crossed for me! Cheers!
(X-ray of hip is post -surgery Feb 2010)

One Aggravated Hip and Hipster!!!

OK! Where shall I begin.... I don't want to come off as one very angry hipster..I prefer to be a more chill hipster, but that may not be the case at the moment....due to ONE thing....at my apt with DR M. this past monday he put out the word "THR"!!!!!!!!!!

For all you non-hipsters THR=Total Hip Replacement. Now if I am not mistaken I just spent the past 4 years of my life undergoing 3 surgeries and 3 recoveries so I would not have to have a THR, because it was not recommended for someone my age. For Reals!!! I am at a lost for words..which is very unusual for me ;)
So at this moment I am awaiting a day surgery in January at BI hospital since I am now officially to old for Children's to have a diagnostic procedure on my hip joint. According to DR. M it just may have been to late to save my hip with the "conservative method" due to the arthritis in my hip from all the cartilage damage and lack of labrum. Again for all you non-hipsters..A THR (in most circumstances) would have been a much easier surgery and recovery than the surgery I had this past year. Also a THR will not fix my psoas tendon issue caused by my previous surgeries..again lost for words. He is not quite sure how my psoas tendon will turn out..there is not a lot he feels like he can do..it's a very tricky tendon that has been inflamed for years. Immobilization of it will only make my hip worse and doing surgery on it could risk making the tendon worse..can I  say WTF on here..well it's my blog and I just did! I told you I was angry!
At this point I am still using my cane for distance, still can't drive (that "drives" me crazy) and still in physical therapy. My physical therapist has been amazing and is not quite giving up on me and my hip like I feel Dr M is at the moment. He is still all about strengthening my weak and atrophied muscles, protecting my tendons, and trying to get my hip to work as best as it possibly can..Yay PT Guy.... my hip and I thank you!!!!!!!!

I will leave this post off on a happy note..don't want to be now labeled as the "Angry Hipster" ;)!!!  "D" got me a puppy...(take a look back to my post on "Puppy Love") and I was right puppies really are the best medicine!!

A Hipster In Waiting....

 I am sorry I haven't written much lately. Like my title says I am a "Hipster in Waiting". I had my procedure a month ago. Two injections: one around my psoas tendon to see if the inflammation can calm down and the other for my IT band inflammation and bursitis. I can say my IT band seems to have improved since the injections, but not much improvement with my psoas tendon which is truly beyond frustrating..it helped maybe for a few days maximum..after one week of excruciating pain post injection. I had to actually go back to taking my pain pills for three days post injections. When I saw Dr M before they knocked me out for the procedure he said that "the fix" for this may take a bit, but he would try his best to truly fix my hip. I am seeing him in a few weeks to discuss what comes next...is it all my psoas tendon or am I still having issues with my actual hip that is making my psoas tendon not calm down. What happens next I am not so sure, but I will make sure to get back to you once I know ;)

In the past month I also had my birthday..which was a great weekend with some of my family and D (pic to the left of b-day weekend), but it also marks the fact that I have been in pain every day for four years with this hip which is in all honestly is quite depressing. I just don't understand why they can't fix my hip, it really doesn't make sense... they do face transplants nowadays how can a hip be so challenging!! I know I am not the only one with this frustration..I have so many fellow hip sisters who have had multiple hip surgeries and still haven't been cured, and I can't figure out why it is so difficult for our Dr's to fix us. Would a hip replacement be the answer?? Or have we been messed around with so much that it wouldn't take the same?? So many questions and not enough answers.
I also tried acupuncture for my hip this past month...if it wasn't so expensive I would do it every week (It really should be covered by health insurance). I didn't see a major improvement with my hip, but it helped me relax and took some pain away during the visit..it was very cool and I definitely want to have another session. I would be interested in the long term results.
I also started back with Physical Therapy. I had to take a break for two weeks because of my procedure, and then due to my health insurance I had to reapply, so I went through a new PT initial evaluation again. My PT guy said that I have muscle atrophy and some very tight muscles. So back to the gym first for a few weeks  to build up strength, and then hopefully back into the water for some more aqua therapy which I feel is the best therapy for me and my hip.
Well that's it for now....Later Hipsters ;)

My Last Hurrah At Children's Hospital!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fldsy-fpXO0

To go forwards we sometimes need to look back. The link above is to a video I made that I have posted on You Tube to share with YOU my fellow hipsters and readers! It captures parts of the past four years of my recovery. It doesn't include all of my recovery or even all the people who have been a HUGE part of my recovery (how many pics does one actually take during bad times ;)).  I just really set out making this mini movie to reflect on what my past fours years have been like for me and my hip. Now I am trying to put the past behind me, and to inspire myself and my hip-chicks that there will be a light at the end of this hipster tunnel..even though at times it is very hard to see that . Through our rough times we have found strength, we have found new friendships, we know who really is our true support team, we are thankful for all the help we have received, we try to have fun even during the hard times, we have shed many tears, we pull ourselves back up again, we try to learn from the hand we have been dealt, and most importantly we have learned we are some very tough hip-chicks!

This week I will be going in for my final procedure at Children's Hospital..the cutoff at CH is 36 years old (they move you over to the old people's hospital after that (just kidding) you can have surgery at Beth Israel Hospital after that, so I can still keep my surgeon just get "worked on" in a different environment). Not to discuss my age at all, but I may be approaching their cut off...so hopefully this last one will be the one that makes my pain go away.....fingers crossed!

I am having some MAJOR issues with my psoas tendon and IT band...double ugh! This procedure will look deeper into this issue...I am not exactly sure of all the details...I think my mind is officially fried when I see a Dr about hips. I am so burnt out on the subject....I want action not talk at this point! The idea I guess is that they will explore my psoas tendon to see if scar tissue is strangulating it or try to get to the root of the inflammation that literally makes my recovery seem at times impossible due to pain, as well as making walking without a cane for any kind of distance not a option at this point. This issue also makes sitting or standing for any significant amount of time a nightmare as well...bottom line this needs to be fixed. The procedure is under anesthesia and should last 45 minutes..if there is a clear passage way they will fill the area with cortisone..(oral anti inflammatory meds did not work.) If there is a bigger issue than another surgery will have to happen, but lets not go down that path at this moment. I will fill you in once I know more....
Hope You enjoy the video and please keep your fingers crossed for me..Thanks xoxo

(PS. Thank You D for recording the song for my video..you're the best!)

PPS: These are self portraits I have taken this past week..pain wise this has been a rough one, but I try to capture the moments when I can put a smile on my face :)

Me and My Psoas

I haven't posted in a bit, because I haven't had a whole lot to say on everything hip ;)
Current Situation is as follows 7 months post surgery:
*Can walk in apartment without my cane
*Need to use a cane for any other kind of distance/ stairs/ etc..
* Still doing Aquatic Therapy twice a week, and the other days I am doing my stationary bike at home for 30 minutes plus all my PT stretches
*Taking 800mg of Motrin 3 times a day  to try to help with my inflamed psoas tendon...first course of action to try to make it "calm down" (I seem to be able to only handle it twice a day due to my stomach...motrin can cause ulcers and feel pretty harsh in your system..they have me on prilosec and zantac to help)
*Still Can't Drive (UGH) due to weakness in right leg/ and irritated psoas tendon/ and the major muscle near my hip that was cut through is not bouncing back currently...fingers crossed it will soon.
*Still can't do stairs "normally" due to psoas tendon and muscle
*This Just In:  I also have IT band tendinitis now as well as psoas ...excellent..notice sarcasm! Pretty much to help either one of these tendons/ tendinitis..it will hurt the other...talk about your catch-22..double ugh! I have a call into Dr M about this.
* Pain has increased but I am not taking any pain meds except for the motrin. I am using ice packs and my E-Stim kit.
* Need to get insoles for shoes and make sure I have appropriate sneakers and no heels (like I didn't already know that/learn my lesson ;)) My PT guy said the two No-No's for feet wear post hip surgery are Uggs and flipflops..so I guess my Ugg flipflops were a mistake to wear all summer...now he tells me! He also said my walk is a little bit off..I move my right leg in a more circular motion ....he said my body is doing it naturally to protect my psoas tendon, but now because of it my IT band is irritated. So I guess I  need to learn how to walk on one leg... ;) Ok.. being sarcastic again ;)

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.......

My status through my eyes currently is as follows:
In a much better place than I was 2 months ago, but I am not better than before surgery, if anything it is worse. My psoas tendon is even more irritated (this has been an issues since surgery #1), and now I have this IT band/muscle "issue".   Honestly I have no idea how my hip feels. I have a deep ache and pain under my incision, but I have no idea if that is from my hip/ screws in hip/ arthritis/ IT band/ inflammation/or scar tissue. I am 7 months post surgery and I know Dr. M said I really got to give it a year to see if it worked (that is when we are scheduled to meet again) so hopefully time will heal these wounds ;)

My current philosophy is take it day by day, and even go one step further by just trying to stay in the moment I am in. I am trying to stay away from the what if's and all the other stress my hip has been putting upon me (yes.. I am blaming my hip).

This post is really for my fellow hipsters (and anyone who is curious on the status of my right hip ;) ) I don't want to discourage anyone..just putting out there where I am at in my own personal recovery. The jury is still out for me if these surgeries actually work or not ...hopefully they do!!!!!